I hired a sleep consultant

Our daughter has always been a terrible sleeper. She was the baby that woke up every 1-3 hours every single night. My husband and I developed a system where he would take the first part of the night shift (8pm-1am) and I’d take the second half (1am-6am). It worked and this is how we survived our first year of parenthood.

Our son is the opposite. He loves his sleep. He has slept great from day one and still takes 2-3 hour naps every day as a two-year old. But I am responsible for enabling both kids to develop bad sleep habits over the years.

First, I can fall asleep quickly and easily. It’s one of my hidden superpowers and my secret sauce to being able to get up and go every day. Unfortunately, it’s made it easy for me to pull the kids into bed with us so we can all fall back asleep. If you can imagine or relate, you know that even a king-size bed does not have enough space for two adults and two toddlers. Side note: this is probably one of the driving reasons I had to start making appointments with a massage therapist on a regular basis!

Second, I thought I was a good mom by taking the time to lay with the kids in bed before they fell asleep. I learned this is a big no-no. It makes sense. This routine became Mia’s social hour with Mom. I have listened to so many random stories and thoughts at this time of the hour. Sometimes (often times) her stories put me to sleep first!

The conversation goes a little like this. "Mom I have to tell you a question!”

“What is your question, Mia?”

“One day I’m going to get a new puppy like Gabe and Nora (our two boxers).”

“Mhmm.”

“Mom, don’t say mhmm.”

“Okay.”

“Mom, I have to tell you a question!”

“What is your question, Mia?”

“A long, long time ago, when Andre was really little he lived in your tummy. Now he is big like me!”

“That’s right. It’s time to go to bed now”

“But Mom, I just have to tell you one more question!”

“Okay, one more question then we have to go to bed.”

Five stories later and I’m the one sleeping like a baby.

I admit that I miss some of my late-night conversations with Mia (she usually puts Andre to bed too), I understand that my presence created more stimulation than Zen. Besides, both kids still tell me plenty of crazy stories and ideas during the daytime!

Third, I thought that a variety of evening activities was a good thing, and a flexible bedtime made our kids more adaptable. It turns out they actually thrive with a consistent bedtime schedule. My husband and I are alike in this way, and in this instance does not play to our favor. We like to be on the go so we’ll often have the kids nap in the car or push back bedtime so we can golf, go out, play with the neighbors…. you get the point. Our new bedtime routine is a big change for us.

The breaking point was a recent stint with both kids waking up and crawling into bed with us each night, then waking up in the morning feeling exhausted. I’d catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror at 3am, with dark circles and puffy eyes and think, “This is what your kids have done to you. Go back to bed. You could use another hour or two of sleep.”

At one point I remember asking my husband, “What is wrong with them? They are 4 and 2-years-old now. They should easily be sleeping all night!” I was at my wits’ end. I have a hard time asking for help, but it was time to wave the white flag.

And then we met the sleep fairy. AKA Annie. The timing was perfect because we happened to see a review on social media from an old high school friend. She recently hired a sleep consultant and proclaimed it to be life changing. I thought, “No way. Is this for real?” I was skeptical but my husband persuaded me to reach out anyway.

My first meeting with Annie was insightful. I knew her program would require some big changes. I felt nervous but also excited at the thought of a full night of sleep! We took the leap of faith and committed to her program. I remember my husband making a skeptical comment about some of the changes and I reminded him, “The first step to having success is to believe.” So, for the next two weeks he proclaimed, “I believe!” I smile and shake my head thinking about it but the truth is that it was a good reminder to stay consistent and trust the process.

My review? Annie’s consulting IS worth it. Mia went from a bedtime of 9pm to 7:30pm and can go to sleep independently! She sleeps all night and does not get out of bed until 6:45am. Can you believe it? I am still amazed. She is a rock star and is super proud to tell the sleep fairy how well she is sleeping.

We are now applying the sleep plan to Andre and we’ve already seen major improvements. His bedtime moved from 8:30pm to 7-7:30pm. He also falls asleep independently and he sleeps all night! We are working toward a wake-up time of 6:45am (he still wants to wake up a little earlier) and are seeing incremental improvement every day.

Daycare also shared their naps have dramatically improved. Mia particularly likes to fight naptime but now is able to relax quickly and fall asleep for 45-60 minutes. On the weekends she may not nap but happily cooperates for 1-hour of quiet time in her room.

Who is Annie? In our home (and I’m guessing many other homes) she is the Sleep Fairy. More formally known as Zen Sleep Consulting. Pay her a visit if you want better sleep. She can help all ages, even adults. I’d argue that she’s worth every penny.